Charlie’s Birth Story

As is my tradition, I am documenting my birth story. If not for anyone else, I like to remember how each child entered the world. So, read if you like, but also know that there may be what some consider TMI (too much info). Read with caution. ha!

First, I want to share a couple of pictures of a note that Abriella had written quickly in a class at church a few Sundays before the birth. I kept this on our dresser after she gave it to me so that I could see it. “Hope” has become such a meaningful word to me over the past year and a half.

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So, having had babies earlier than the due date comes with some challenges. Mental challenges. (Some might say I have mental challenges ALL the time). Then, when the physical signs start coming, the challenge comes stronger. So, on Wednesday night, the 19th, I had a few hours of mild contractions. They were not braxton hicks. These were actually contractions that were in my back, which has only ever happened with my “real” contractions. So, I laid awake, wondering if these would turn into anything, but they didn’t. I went to sleep.

On Thursday, the 20th, I had sporadic contractions throughout the day. I visited the chiropractor and she said my pelvis was definitely more mobile than it had been in the previous week. She did some adjustments to also try to encourage proper positioning of the baby. Ridley and I also went grocery shopping. What an uncomfortable shopping trip!

Historically, I’ve never had contractions before it was actually labor time. So, I wasn’t sure what to think about these. I did send a text to my midwife, Sandra, around 4:40pm to let her know what had been happening. I told her I wasn’t sure if they would turn into anything more or not and I was still continuing on as usual. Later, she texted me to see where things were—if she should stay at the birth center (to be closer to me) or go home. I told her to go home as there was no action on my part. That was at 7:30 pm.

So, I had been “planning” for a while to make it to this particular weekend of 37 1/2 wks before giving birth. Funny, I know. It was a goal to get to 37 wks and then get through the 1st week of school for the kids. Certainly, I was trying to be ok with going past that, too. The hard thing is that I also really wanted this rainbow baby in my arms, safe and sound. Once you enter the baby loss community, you know all the stories. All the very sad and hard stories. You know, without a doubt, that there is no safe period in pregnancy.

With that being said, I was also to the “I’m done” point of pregnancy. I’ve reached this with every pregnancy and the baby was born shortly thereafter. It’s kind of odd how that has happened. Well, I’m not sure I had hit that point with Ridley just yet that I had verbalized it. The others, I had verbalized it in some form or another to Stephen. I had reached that point with this one. It’s kind of pitiful how soon I reach that point. Like, seriously, I have no sympathy for myself when I get to that point at 37ish weeks! But, it’s when my pelvis is seriously aching, more pelvic pressure, waddling takes on full force, etc.

OK, fair warning: TMI ahead. Skip this paragraph and the next if you want to miss this part. Of course, now, you’re all curious…  So, one part that I never wrote in my birth story for Colby (totally should go back and add it before I’m too old to remember how it all actually played out) was the last thing that happened before his labor started. I had been trying all day to go into labor with him without any success. So, my last attempt was to end the pregnancy the way it had started. So, that’s what happened, and then about 30 minutes later, the whirlwind labor started. HA! The husband was pretty pleased with himself.

So, this pregnancy, I was asking for the same ending on this particular night. Stephen had not touched me in a few weeks in this oh so loving way (can’t say I really cared to anyway–too uncomfortable!).  He was not wanting to because it wasn’t his chosen night for me to deliver. HA! I told him that it was mine! And, I said I doubted it would work anyway. He confidently said it would. haha. Anyway, about 30 minutes after… I had a contraction. On the second contraction, I felt 2 little pops way low. I thought, hmmm, that reminds me of when my water broke with Colby, except it was way more dramatic with Colby. I pushed a tiny bit and a little gush of fluid came out. I went to the potty and there was a little pink with the clear fluid. Bingo. That was at 10:10pm.

So, I still always have a small doubt of my water breaking and want to be confident of it before notifying anyone. Anyway, I wasn’t contracting very often. They were like 10 or so minutes apart and mild. So, I just laid in the bed for a while watching the clock. Then, I decided to go sit in the rocking chair in the living room. Stephen was sleeping through this part as I hadn’t told him anything. (Later, he told me he knew something was going on because, in his words, “you were doing your thing.”). About 11:45 pm, I decided to finally let him know. I told him I was pretty sure my water had broken… He said, uh huh, yep. Kind of like, I told you this would happen! HA! I texted Sandra a few minutes later, just before midnight. Told her that possibly my water had broken (still doubting myself as it wasn’t a ton of fluid) and that I was contracting, but still easily manageable, but they were about every 3-5 minutes now. So, she said she’d better head my way (she lives like 45 minutes away).

Anyway, Stephen and I turned on the lights and start getting things in place in our room. I set up my essential oils diffuser, too. Diffused Balance with Wild Orange all throughout. Contractions came here and there, but they were just not that strong at all. I think Sandra arrived around 1:00 am (Friday the 21st now). I had talked to my friend, Bergen, somewhere around 12:30am or so, and learned she couldn’t come. She was home with her little boy, and her husband was gone that night. If birth had been imminent and Sandra wasn’t going to make it, she would’ve come. I told her that it was fine and we’d be good!

So, when Sandra arrived, she got all her stuff in the house and then started checking me out, taking vitals and listening to baby, etc. I then told her that Bergen wasn’t coming, so she called for someone else to come assist. Her name was Bethaney. I had met her at the birth center previously. Not sure what time she arrived exactly. I really didn’t keep up with the time much during the night.  This was a picture that we took before anyone arrived. I look to be in hard labor, right!? HA! Bit of trivia: I have worn the same set of pants and shirt for all of my labors and Stephen has worn the same shorts. They’re our labor clothes. haha!


So, as stated earlier, I had been doubting the reality of my water breaking. But, I did start getting more obvious gushes of fluid so that there was no doubt. The contractions still weren’t anything to really write home about. Interestingly, the last few weeks leading up to birth, I had prayed for a peaceful labor. The entire pregnancy was much more stressful and emotional, occurring after 2 of our babies went to heaven. I just wanted peace and calm for the ending. Something about being chaotic and crazy fast like Colby’s labor didn’t appeal to me. I wanted all parties to be present and ready. I didn’t want any drama if possible. God answered this prayer.

So, some are aware of my involvement with a group called Hope Mommies. Well, they have some song playlists on Spotify.  One of the playlists is called Everyday Encouragement. I turned my phone onto this playlist. It went for the entire night. I just can’t explain some of the emotions that went along with hearing some of those songs throughout the night. Several songs meant so much to me since our babies went to heaven. It is well by Bethel is a hugely meaningful song to me. It played towards the very end while I was in the birth pool (more on that later) and it brought tears to my eyes. O Lord by Lauren Daigle is another one of my favorites. Oceans by Hillsong is another one that means a lot. All of these songs are associated to different parts of my journey in my mind. To have them playing during labor and delivery spoke to me in some very special ways. It was a reminder to me that God was definitely with us.

So, as the night progressed, I started to get a little impatient. Just seemed to be taking longer to me. Again, I wasn’t watching the clock, so no idea how long things were really active labor like. I did have to stay up and moving for labor to be very effective with this one. When I would sit or lay down (like to check my vitals and baby’s heart beat), the contractions spaced out tremendously. That was an interesting part to me in this labor. Just standing up and even moving my legs up and down would lead to effective contractions. So, up we were. I tried at one time to walk up and down the stairs a bit, but something in one of my legs started hurting doing that. Would’ve been fine if I had put some shoes on, but who wants to do that?! ha! Clearly, I didn’t.

So, positions included walking around downstairs, hands and knees, sitting on an exercise ball (contractions stopped when sitting on it), doing some dancing moves with my legs that we did in a class at the birth center, and you know, getting down and up from the potty (that’s pretty difficult at some points, and it always seems that brings on a contraction!). The birth pool was set up in our room and it was just there mocking me. HA! I didn’t want to get in it too soon so as to slow down labor.

Around 5 am, we decided to wake Abriella up, since she had wanted to be at the birth. This is when we decided I could get into the pool. For those that wonder, I was never checked for dilation during pregnancy or during labor. I just went with what my body did, and Sandra, in her very knowledgeable ways, can tell based on what I’m doing about where I am in labor. I love that. Leading up to this time, contractions were definitely harder to work through. I was really depending on Stephen to apply counter pressure to my back and support me during this time. Stephen has always been so good for all of my different labors, whether that was coaching from the front seat of a van while driving who-knows-how-fast, or applying counter pressure, or praying over me, or just verbally encouraging me. He said a super sweet and powerful prayer over me at some point during this labor towards the end. I can’t remember when exactly.

I always have back labor for whatever reason. I figure it’s the way my body is made. But, this labor, I had even more painful back labor. The reason why is probably because this baby really was posterior for most of the labor. Something in my pelvis rotated him at the end, so he came out anterior. This might also be why this labor was a little slower. But, oh my back. There is just no describing how intense that is.

So, Abriella came downstairs and she was very confused. She told us later that she had actually been dreaming when Stephen woke her up. She had been dreaming that I was having the baby and that it was a boy. So, she said she actually pinched herself to make sure she wasn’t still dreaming. Bless her. (But, hey, she guessed it was a boy!).

So, the water felt great! We added some new hot water. Abriella and Bethaney got some of the colder water out with a big pot. I was on hands and knees, squatting, 1 leg out to the side while kind of on the other knee, I laid my head on the side of the pool, etc. It felt really good! When the contractions came, they were intense! As Abriella later stated, “I didn’t know mama could groan that loud.” ha! While I was in the pool before pushing, It is Well started playing on my phone. I started crying while it was playing. Sweet Bethaney was offering me a towel to wipe my nose every little while. This was a powerful reminder to me at the perfect time.

I don’t know when I started pushing. I don’t know how long I pushed. I don’t think it was very long, although it might’ve felt like it. I don’t know anything other than back labor, so can’t say personally what it feels like otherwise. But, with back labor, it does not feel good to push. I have to very much just push into the incredible back pain that goes with the pushing, which is against what every fiber in my body wants to do. And, I don’t know if he was rotating during this time or what, but it was more intense than the others (well, Abriella was just different, so can’t compare hers) during this pushing. This is when I became more vocal.

At one point, I did reach down and feel, and indeed, his head was there, so that gave me extra motivation. After his head was born, his body didn’t come quickly. I said something to the effect of “Get the baby out!” This is the only time that Sandra really laid hands on me. I don’t think she was worried, but just seeing what was going on. She told me later that his head was there, but his shoulders were way up–not a shoulder dystocia though. I repositioned myself (I don’t know if someone told me to, or I just did), and then he came on out. Stephen and Sandra both had hands on baby. Oh, sweet relief!! Born at 5:56 am on August 21st, 2015.

We placed baby on me and placed a warm wet towel on him. He quickly began to wail! Such incredible joy and relief and…well, it was just super emotional! I just couldn’t stop crying. I think it was a couple of minutes before we even looked to see gender. Abriella asked, of course. So, we peeked and she assured us she was fine with a boy when she learned the official gender. She had told us that before, but I know in her heart, she really wanted a sister. Sweet girl. We waited until the cord stopped pulsating (I remember it was quite a while–maybe 15-20 minutes) before cutting it. Abriella was able to feel the pulsating cord, which she thought was cool. When it came time to cut, she got to cut the cord. Placenta delivered shortly thereafter. Then, Sandra gave Abriella a mini lesson about placentas. I moved to the bed shortly after this and just loved on our boy! For my remembering only, I did tear in that same place that I always tear a little. But, it wasn’t even bleeding. I’ve never needed stitches with any of my births, thankfully.

Here are some pictures. You’ll notice in some of the pictures that Charlie’s face is quite bruised. That’s what happens coming through my birth canal sometimes! Ridley was like that, too! It was pretty much gone by the next day. Around one of his eyes, he was slightly swollen for a while longer.

First one, I love that Stephen and Abriella both have their hands on the new baby. The next few pictures…oh the emotion!

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Abriella cutting the cord below and then standing proudly with her proud daddy! Love this picture!

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The big weigh in. 7 lbs 2 oz (not bad for 37 wks 3 days). This is our awesome midwife, Sandra! I think I’ll have to take a picture that she’s ready for at our 6 wks visit! 🙂

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The boys got to meet their baby brother! Ridley was a little irked that he wasn’t woken up for the birth. He said, “I wanted to see the baby come out!” We actually knew this, but we were going to only consider this if the birth occurred during his waking hours. Both Colby and Ridley were super surprised to come downstairs to a new baby!



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We were incredibly blessed through this birth. It was such an emotional one for me. But, as Stephen said, “It was our most successful birth,” meaning different things that we had desired actually occurred.  Truly, we’ve been blessed with all of our births. Even the birth of Tiny felt sacred when it occurred. I finally got a waterbirth, it was not crazy fast, it was a peaceful pace, it was at night which I just like better than day (Ridley was our only daytime birth, and it just seemed odd for some reason, ha!), Abriella got to be there like she wanted, and most of all, we got a very healthy little baby!

I felt a bit of healing perhaps through this birth. I thought about our babies that are enjoying heaven throughout the labor, and I still think about them daily. I don’t know when or if there will be a time in life when I don’t think about them and wonder. I think that’s ok. One day, Charlie will know about his siblings that didn’t live before him, too. I think it’s possible his older siblings might even tell him one day before me. I imagine Colby would be one to tell him. I guess we’ll see one day.

We are just so thankful! We are at 1 month and a day since Charlie was born, and it just seems like he’s always been with us in many ways. He’s such an incredible blessing as all 6 of my children are. The babies that aren’t with us blessed us in many ways, too, some of which we haven’t even fully realized yet. Thank you for all of you that have prayed us through this. We ask that you continue to pray for us as we parent our children as long as we are given with them.

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So little time…

I am sorry for those that are checking daily for updates on here. With homeschooling and a new baby, time is precious. Sleep is precious. Both seem to be less than I’d like! HA! We are doing well. I’m working on my birth story. Not finished yet. I’ll add pictures, too. Hang in there!


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Baby Arrival!

So, our sweet, sweet blessing has arrived!

Friday, August 21st at 5:56 am

7 lbs 2 oz

20 1/2 inches

We have a new baby BOY!

Charles (Charlie) Samuel Joyner

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We are soooo thankful for his safe arrival!

Samuel means “God has heard”

We know that He has heard and answered our prayers for this special baby.

Thank YOU for all of your prayers!

More on his arrival soon. 🙂



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37 weeks and 1st Day of School

Here we are at 37 wks! I am considered term now! Yay! Here is a picture from today.


Last night, I was having strong braxton hicks contractions for quite a while into the night. I started to think they might turn into real contractions, but they finally eased up around 2 am. Stephen had told me I couldn’t have a baby last night anyway. HA! He has given the green light for a weekend delivery. hahaha! We’ll see how that all works out. I am ready to hold this sweet baby in my arms!

Prenatal appointment went well today. Baby is a guesstimate of about 7 lbs now. Baby also seems to be in a posterior position, at least today. Still head down. I have suspected a posterior position many times because I feel lots of little parts kicking on the front of my abdomen more than the sides. That can be an indication of a posterior lying baby. Sandra also thought she felt a hand down near the baby’s head. I said, yep, I have suspected that as well. Feels like a little hand just poking and swiping across down there lower. What does all this mean? Eh, well, I’ll do more of the spinning babies exercises to try to encourage baby to a more favorable position. But, with it being my 4th term delivery, it likely won’t be a big deal. My pelvis is probably just fine to handle some of the odd positions. But, I also wouldn’t be surprised if the baby just rotates during labor anyway. Many do. So, I’m not worried.

Aside from the 37 wks, the kids started back to school today! We are doing the blended model school again. They were on campus today, and we’ll have our 1st homeschool day tomorrow. Abriella was so excited. Colby was nervous. Both ended up having a fabulous day! They were all smiles when I picked them up today. Here are some pictures of them.

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I suppose maybe I should help fix their hair a little more next time. HA! Colby has the same teacher that Abriella did in 1st grade. We love her! We look forward to getting to know Abriella’s teacher this year. We did not know her before. We are praying for another good year at Providence! Ridley starts to preschool in a couple of weeks. So, for now, he gets to hang with me and run errands and lay around until baby arrives. 🙂

So, we all say, come on baby! 😉

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Well, here we are at the end of the summer break, and I feel like our house is in utter chaos! We were supposed to be all ready for school and baby. Well, our upstairs is a complete mess! The nursery has furniture moved into the middle, drop clothes all over the place, paint supplies, a ladder, etc. Then, the rest of the furniture has been moved to the playroom. So, the playroom is a total disaster area as well. Oy!

The kids start school tomorrow. I’m certain they have their book bags ready and lunches made, so that’s good. I forgot about teacher’s gifts, so that’s out. I’m not going anywhere now to get something. Well, aside from the fact that Stephen isn’t here anyway. Can’t leave the kids alone. Maybe during the day tomorrow, Ridley and I can get something. But, maybe not.

We’ve had things breaking lately, so Stephen has been in repair mode. I’m thankful he is so handy! I would rather him spend time on things besides stupid breaking stuff, though. That’s just the way it goes though, right?

Tomorrow, I’ll be 37 wks. Full-term! Yay! While I’m so incredibly anxious to have our baby earthside, I feel completely out of sync right now. I don’t have any inkling as to when this baby will arrive. Right now, I’d just like to get the upstairs somewhat back in order though! Maybe when Stephen gets back, the nursery can be put back into order a slight bit. It’s painted for now. We’ll add some gender specific color touches after the baby arrives. But, for now, it’s done. Also, school…. First campus day tomorrow, first homeschool day is on Wednesday. Oy. Let’s get school started.

Pray for peace for me. Peace in God’s timing. Peace in the chaos. God’s in control. I don’t need to be…and that is so hard for me!

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A Peak Inside Our Journey

I just wanted to share some thoughts of the journey we are on. If you know me, or have read this blog with any regularity, you know that this baby follows the loss of 2 babies last year. That is why the posts are always tagged with “baby #6,” as this is our 6th baby. Our babies were real, and I am certain we will meet them in heaven one day.

I do wish others would include our babies in the count. When asked by complete strangers how many kids I have, I do often say this is our 4th, not wanting to get into it with some random at wal-mart, ya know. Recently, someone said to Ridley that he was finally going to be a big brother. My 2 older kids were pulling at me, saying to me and trying to interrupt the lady and inform her of the fact that he already was a big brother to our babies in heaven. I love that they do not forget!

In the spring of 2014, we were in a marriage study with a wonderful older couple. When they introduced themselves the first night, they told how many kids they had. They also shared how many grandchildren they had, saying that 2 of them were in heaven . They included the babies their kids had lost in pregnancy. I remember thinking that was so special. We hardly knew this couple, but this was just part of their introduction they shared. This happened to be before we lost our babies (both of those losses ended up occurring during that study). I still think just how special it is that they include ALL of their grandchildren in their count of how many they have. Each one is special. This couple also were an incredible source of encouragement after we lost our babies.

I do love explaining my “hope nest necklace” with others when they ask about it. It has 6 pearls in it, 1 for each our our babies, here, in heaven, and in utero. They are all my babies, even if we don’t get to meet some until heaven. 🙂

And, what is pregnancy after loss like? Well, I can’t go into all of it in one single post. I do want to share a few things. So, the kids almost daily ask right now when the baby will be born? I don’t know is pretty much the standard answer. Well, one day recently, Colby and Abriella were beside my bed where I was sitting. Colby said, “What if this baby isn’t born?” I said, “Oh, this baby will be born.” He said, “I mean, what if this baby doesn’t get to stay on earth with us?” Oh, my heart. I couldn’t tell him that there was no way that would happen. I just said something to the effect of “Oh…yes… that would be very, very sad…” Abriella just sadly said, “Oh, I don’t want to think about that.”  I told her I didn’t either. This is the reality of it all though. I don’t think Colby has missed many nights this entire pregnancy of praying that “the baby in mommy’s tummy is growing, healthy, and will stay on earth with us.”

Then, there was a day that Ridley asked me when my baby, Tiny, was going to be born. ~Sigh~ I had to remind him that our Tiny already had been born, but was in heaven already, and we wouldn’t get to meet him until we got to heaven. I told him this was a new baby. He was like, oh, ok.

For me, yesterday brought back some sad memories I hadn’t anticipated. We finally started painting our nursery, which is so exciting. When I say “we,” I mean Stephen. 🙂 Anyway, last night, my mind went back to last January (2014) when we were painting Abriella’s room. It was during that day that I started bleeding. That was the beginning of losing our 1st baby. A few months later, we lost our 2nd baby. Grief is just so interesting how it pops up. Just reminded me again of the beginning of a journey I never anticipated.

This pregnancy has been a journey in trust. I now fully believe that nothing that happens is a shock to God. He is fully sovereign and in control. He is all powerful. When someone dies, whether is was a horrific, tragic, peaceful, merciful, surprise, or expected, death, He doesn’t say, “whoa, didn’t see that coming!” He knows. He is in control. Satan is not in control. There is so, so much more to this that I’m still learning about. One book that I’m still not done with (after starting it over a year ago—good thing it’s on my kindle!), is Trusting God: Even When Life Hurts by Jerry Bridges. In fact, when I first started reading it not long after Tiny died, it made me mad, and I put it away for months. It was so confusing to me, and brought so many questions to mind. But, I am still working through it and need to go back through it…probably about a 100 times.

I can tell you, though, that us losing 2 babies in 2014 has changed Stephen and I. Our theology has evolved into something new. I hate that we don’t have those babies with us. But, I know God had a purpose for their short lives. I may never fully understand it. I know He has a purpose for the life of our baby that we are anxiously awaiting. I am fervently praying that His purpose is for our baby to live an amazing life for Him with us here on earth. I am desperately trying to trust in His sovereign will.

Will you continue to pray with us? We have been so thankful for the support we have received through this pregnancy especially. We are praying that God will carry us through, and we desperately desire a happily screaming baby in our arms soon!

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When are you going to have your baby?

Well, I don’t know! Like I always told my patients, if I knew when they were going to have their baby, I’d make a whole lot more money than I did as a midwife!! Same for my babies. I have no idea when this sweet thing will come. Yes, historically, I’ve delivered on the earlier side, but that’s not to say that I will this time.

Some have asked me if I was having any signs of labor, specifically contractions. Well, truth is, I’ve never had one bout of false labor with any of mine. Once contractions started, it was go time! And, it’s not often a long time of contractions! I have Braxton Hicks contractions all the time, but I have those for months before the baby comes. Those do not signify impending birth at all.

Truly, I’m feeling pretty good. My phantom gallbladder rarely aches. My back doesn’t bother me much (thank you chiropractor!), I don’t feel nauseous. I do get some shooting pains from nerves being irritated, but I can live with that nuisance. I do have to pee frequently since the baby’s head is pretty much resting on my bladder all the time. So, maybe I don’t rest as much as I’d like.  I’m hot, but everyone is in these triple digit days of the Texas heat! I’m grateful to have a/c!

Our house is relatively clean, the kids are gearing up for starting school on Tuesday, and we’re hopefully going to see about painting the nursery this weekend. The bedding came in on Monday! The kids ask everyday if the baby is coming today. I reply with well, I don’t know! HA! Because, well, I don’t know!

So, we wait. We trust. We let the baby keep growing and getting stronger! We pray that everything goes smoothly and is uneventful, and I’ve even asked the Lord for a “sweet birth.” 🙂 He knows the date and time, and I don’t have to. So glad He’s got this!

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36 wks

Yay, 36 wks! I like each milestone we hit, but I do like 36 wks as one of them! Here’s a picture from today.



Today, my midwife came for a home visit, just to make sure everything is in order and she remembers how to get here. Since we did mostly home visits with the pregnancy with Ridley (she didn’t have her birth center then), she drove right to our house today, no problems. Anyway, baby is doing great! Head seemed to be in a bit of a better position this week. My GBS result was negative! Yay! My iron levels are really good, too! I tell you, I eat lots of iron laden foods, so I figured I would probably be good on that one.

Tonight, Stephen moved our bed over a little bit to make more space for the birthing pool. I’ve never ended up with a water birth for different reasons, but we’re going to give it a try again this time. We have the pool blown up and just hanging out in the office for now. Just gotta keep curious children from messing with it! We have our birth kit, too. Also, my sweet friend (former midwife colleague from my Ft Hood days) has moved to town, and is ready to help out as needed. I really am just excited for her to be present at our birth! If she needs to be the birth midwife, she’ll be fantastic! We’re getting together later this week to catch up. Also, I have a couple of friends in our neighborhood that would be happy to take Ridley when birth time comes, if it occurs during the day. If it occurs during the night, hopefully, he’ll sleep through it.

So, now, we just wait to see when things happen! This is when I feel like a ticking time bomb. But, I’m excited for this little one to arrive! The kids can hardly wait! And, boy, it is hot here! We have been solidly in the triple digits lately. But, you know what…today was the 1st time I really felt the effects of the heat. Like, I felt bad. I stayed home from the outreach program we go to each Tuesday night. Ridley stayed home with me and we read books in the bed until the others returned. I started feeling better after a while, thankfully. I’d say it’s pretty good that it’s taken this long before I had a really yuck feeling from the heat!

All in all, I’m still doing good. Some days, I feel like this baby will not be in for much longer. Other days, I’m like, eh, we could still have a few weeks. So, we’ll just see! I’m thankful that we are where we are, and I’m prayerful that we get to have this baby Joyner join us soon, happy and healthy. Praying for a sweet, uneventful labor and delivery. Thank you for those that continue to walk this with us!


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Thoughts at 35 1/2 wks

So, today, I’m 35 3/7 wks, one week before my earliest delivery of my full pregnancies (Ridley). How am I feeling? Well, overall, I feel good. This baby moves a lot! This one feels like he/she is trying to break out often–coming straight out the front or the top…sometimes the bottom. HA! So thankful for a crazy active baby though!

Tonight, I told Stephen that I feel like a walking time-bomb for some reason this time. Not the anger meaning. But, I have a fear that any second my water is going to break this time. I never had that with any of my others, even though my water has broken first with all of them! I have this fear that I’m going to go into labor too early. Right now is too early in my book. I have this fear that we won’t be ready for this one’s arrival.

Why do I feel this way this time? I have no idea. There really are no indications or reasons for such thoughts. Maybe it’s a control issue. I have no control over when my babies come. As much as I try to be ready, I just don’t know when they’ll come, so I may or may not be as ready as I think I want to be.

I know in my heart that God is in control and knows the exact time and day that this little one will show up. I need to rest in that…peacefully. I’m just struggling with that for some reason. I think (ok, I know) it kind of makes me grumpy towards the kids at times. When I clean the floors and then they go tromping through the house with messy feet…I get irritated. After the playroom has been completely cleaned and organized, and then I go up and it appears like a tornado blew through…I get irritated. Oy. They are kids. It’s summertime. I need to let go. This baby isn’t going to care if the playroom is picked up or the floors are cleaned. I guess I shouldn’t either. But, I do…

Anyway, that’s where I am. I have no idea if this baby will come next week or in 4 wks. Although, I’m not thinking we’ll make it to September honestly. But, God knows.

Pray that this baby will arrive safely in His timing, and that I can enjoy this final time of pregnancy with peace and trust in His will.

Here is a little video I took yesterday of a little movement of our sweet baby! It’s hard to get anything on video. Seems the baby knows when I have the video on, and gets all still…until I give up and turn off the recorder. Booger! 🙂


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Updated Picture

Ok, I washed my hair last night and fixed it a little this morning, so I took a picture for this week. ha! So, 35 1/7 wks today. Here’s the “selfie.”


Oy, last night, I was having lots more pressure with my braxton hicks contractions. It took a while into the night for them to finally ease up. They aren’t painful contractions like labor contractions. Those are unmistakable. But, yhey aren’t comfortable because my entire abdomen tightens up nice and hard, and last night, I felt pressure in my bottom with all of these BH contractions. I’ve had that in other pregnancies. I especially remember that more with Colby. Just not pleasant.

I said to Stephen last night, “Man, I really hope we do make it to 37 wks!” Last night, I was having my doubts! But, today has been fine so far. Hardly any BH contractions so far today, and it’s nearly 5 pm. So, it was just one of those days yesterday, I guess. So, the countdown to who-knows-when continues calmly! 🙂

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